Great. The first home study appointment was great. I really like our social worker. She is a really sweet, quiet lady, and adoptive mom to two little girls (so she has lots of great stories…and lots of great information).
Well she showed up early, fifteen minutes early. Good thing I left work early. I wasn't really prepared. I wasn't finished printing out our autobiographical outlines (maybe I will do another post on that thing…lots of fun stuff there). Anyway, one of the questions on the outline was "If you could, what one thing would you change about your spouse?" I just finished explaining my answer to Jace when we realized she was here. For a few minutes I thought he was upset about my answer, I couldn't tell, and now it's too late to change it, she's at the door. So to begin our meeting, I'm sitting there wondering if my wonderful husband is upset with me. Still not sure on that one, I'll get back to you on it later (or maybe Jace will post something about his issues with my answer).
Well we all sat around the kitchen table and talked for a few minutes, you know, introductions and what not. She told us a little about her children (one was adopted internationally, and the other domestic). From there we went into paperwork. She was so impressed with my organized folder and such (shout out to Tricia there…thanks for the help!). All of our answers were typed up, so she could easily read them. We all know what Jace's handwriting looks like. After all that, she took a tour of our home. Nothing much to see there. She had lots of great suggestions for what we could do with the room we call the "Formal Dining Room." I think her idea for a kids game room (with the xbox, wii, and such) was a great idea. Forget an office, I want one of those game rooms. She got to see the mess of what we call an office, which we explained will one day be the baby's room. Then after that, we went to see our bedroom/bathroom. Well, it rained today, so our beautiful babies were locked up in the bathroom (too wet to stay outside), so she got to meet them, and they got to love on her. She was a real trooper and Lucy and Ella were so sweet.
After the tour, we went back to the kitchen table. We talked about our marriage, our desire to have children, and the reasons we decided to go with adoption. Jace did really good on this part. I'm so happy he picked me.
The only part we are kinda concerned about is the citation we got from the St. John the Baptist Parish Sherriff's Department for a dog barking issue. Yes, we had to discuss it. I thought we would be able to leave it out, but no…we had to sign a paper that says we are fully disclosing everything. Well that includes the citation for barking. She didn't seem to think it would be much of a problem, but I guess we will have to see what the reports say. I really hope the barking problem doesn't create problems with the adoption. Geez.
Then she gave us loads of information. Who would have ever thought we would need to contact a pediatrician in New York to discuss medical issues of our adopted child? These doctors get information from adopted parents all over the country, so they would know if the orphanage had potential harmful issues and they would know how to treat it. She also gave us a list of items we would need when we travel to pick up the child. Some of the suggested items include: Desitin (for diaper rash), Nix (for lice), cough and cold meds, thermometer, and baby shampoo. Ok some of these things I would have figured, but I'm sure I would have left the Nix at home…good thing I got the list.
She also gave us a list of positive and negative words to use with adopted parents. This was interesting. With this list, she gave us some suggestions on how to answer some of the questions people will ask. I covered most of these in an earlier blog…but here are a few new ones:
"How could her mother have given up such a beautiful child?" --- Answer: It must have been difficult, but she couldn't take care of any child. (This reassures the child there is nothing wrong with him or her).
"When did you get her?" ---Answer: I picked her up after school to come to the store.
"How much did it cost?" ---My child is priceless. OR How do you put a price on a child?
Just avoid asking people these questions. It's just not appropriate!
Well overall it was a great appointment. We meet again in a couple of weeks to discuss the finding from the Criminal background checks, and what she finds in the autobiographical outline.